Thursday, October 2, 2008

Can't sleep

It is 4 am and I can't sleep. My first thought after waking up was: I can't miss my tee time. Shortly thereafter I remembered that I didn't earn a tee-time today. This sucks.

October 2nd and my season is finished early, once again. Two years ago I missed getting to finals by 2 shots. Last year I missed by 1. Two weeks ago in California, although I didn't hit the ball great, I was really scrappy and missed by one shot per day. I have looked back on those rounds and can easily think of about 8 wasted shots in the first two days that would have been the difference maker. Too many three putts, too many easy chips that were just a bit off.

The thing that is separating me from the girls out there making money is my short game. Plain and simple. Technique is good, execution is typically good, but where I lack is the belief and confidence in shot selection and the belief that I will pull it off. I spend a lot of time working on my short game, but clearly, something needs to change in the way I practice so that it will transfer better to competition. In practice, I can hit shots that I never see any of my competitors hit. I have a really good understanding of what needs to happen in order to have success in my chipping and pitching, yet it hasn't transfered. I have to change.

Once I get the emotion of this week and my season behind me, I will spend time thinking about how I am going to approach next season. There were a lot of things that I did this year that I felt were very beneficial and positive for the success of the majority of my season. Why my performance tailed off over this past month is something that I will have to reflect strongly upon.

The nightmare that was the Canadian Open was a good lesson and I felt that I gleaned a lot from it and was able to apply a lot of that to the rounds I played at first stage at Mission Hills. I hit the ball poorly the first day at Mission Hills yet managed to stay in the game. I think that was a direct result of having a strong mental plan and having the capacity to stick to it. Perhaps because I had poured so much into stage one, mentally I just didn't have the wherewithal to go through that again? The patience had worn thin and because the small mistakes cost me dearly in California, when I saw the same thing happen on the very first hole on Tuesday, the fear of a repeat crept its way into my being? I'm not sure.

For now, I just look forward to getting some distance between me and this place both literally and figuratively.

One thing I also know for sure: I will NOT be staying in this hotel next year. Their poor-ass internet has cost them this customer.

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