Freezing!

Not even a week ago it was sunny and 74 F here in Columbus, but for the last 3 days it has been cloudy and about 40 F (that is about 5 degrees for my metric friends). Brrrrrrrr....

People always say to me: 'you are Canadian, you should be able to handle it!' Well, I haven't spent a winter in Canada in about 5 years and not only that, I have been in California! My blood has definitely thinned out and I have gotten soft. For now, the change in the weather has been alright, it allows me to wear my new jacket and sweaters that I otherwise wouldn't get to wear, but I can see how a month or two of really cold and snow is going to get to me.

Winters in Canada are tough, especially in Alberta. The block heater thing always throws the Californian's for a loop. "What? You plug your car in???" The cord hanging out the front is completely foreign to them and to see a Californian see one for the first time is always worth a funny comment or two.

How annoying is it to have to fish the extension cord out of the snow bank only to find the holes all filled with snow? The fishing is usually followed by the banging on the frozen bumper to try to get the snow out. By this point you have to go pee and are freezing because you don't have mitts and rarely have the right shoes on. Boots? Not many people in Canada wear the appropriate footwear for the temperature and I think it is because once they get to their destination, it is difficult to have the right clothes that make the big white boots look stylish.

If you are organized enough to have your car started in time that when you get in it, it is toasty warm and the windows defrosted, then you are a better winter-er than I ever was. Most of the time I would just have enough time to start the car and go. I would always have to get that $3 wooden scraper out and start scratching at the windows. Taking the ice off was never as bad as clearing the 10" of snow off with that 2" brush. The brush would just go underneath the snow and it wouldn't go anywhere, it would just ruffle up. You had to do it in layers or else you would be there all night.

Finally all the windows are cleared off: windshield, side and back, and you are ready to go so you wedge your huge winter parka behind he wheel and take off. The car is toasty and you back out of the driveway and are on your way. 30 kph...40 kph...60 kph...80 kph...and woosh!

The snow that was on the roof of your car is now on your back window and the snow that was on your hood is now covering your windshield rendering your visibility next to zero. You flick on your windshield wipers and they do little more than what your brush did: go straight underneath the snow. For a mile or two you are relying on the wind and futile attempts by your wipers to clear your vision all the while oncoming cars are going through the exact same thing. Nice and safe.

Once you finally arrive at your location, typically the temperature in the buildings is turned up and you roast in your winter wear. Fortunately you listened to the people who always told you to wear layers so you are able to peel off to a comfortable level. Now, however, you have a heap of extra clothes to carry around and have no place to put them so you have to carry them. Only a winter jacket and 2 sweaters and a scarf aren't only awkward to carry, but they get heavy, so now you are sweating again. By this time it is time to go back outside and head home. You gear up and head outside but are absolutely freezing because you are a little damp from the sweat and now your car is frozen again. Nobody has the patience to start the car, walk back to the store front and wait for your car to warm up, so you just get in and freeze the whole way home.

The next day you look outside after a beautiful fresh snowfall and realize that you are going to have to go through all that again just to get some groceries. Forget it, you decide: I will just eat leftovers now and make eggs for dinner.